Good Enough!

I’m sitting on my bed watching music videos to my favorite songs while having a nice text with my best friend about love, life, and men our age. As a single woman, the very best gift I can give to my whole self is love. This comes in many forms…like surrounding myself with people who elevate me, partaking in activities that support a healthy body and mind, and spending time alone with me to appreciate me. The depression has decreased and all I want to do is try new things and do new things. I even thought about skydiving, but I’ll stick to learning martial arts with my feet on the ground. Oftentimes I wish he were back in my life and next to me trying these things with me. I’m in a good place now and I’d love that. I also got a raise at work, so I am better financially able to try these new things!  I wish him no ill will, and never say anything bad about him because I can’t. It’s not who I am and it’s not how I feel. I still love him and respect him, though some things said to me were rather harsh and I FINALLY KNOW THEY ARE NOT TRUE. I am learning about who I am, what I like, what drives, me. I am sensitive and easily hurt at this time because I am working on building my self-esteem. I am not ready to think about letting anyone in right now. I hope to God I’d have a different reaction if this situation were to happen to me all over again in a few years. I should never surround myself with anyone who thinks I am not good enough. I should NEVER think that I am not good enough. It’s not about not wanting to be around people who may make you feel bad about yourself, it’s about having the self-respect to not engage with such people in the first place. It’s about having so much respect for yourself that the people who don’t THINK you’re enough don’t affect you or your view on the self. I broke down and allowed my life to temporarily become ruined. I vow to never let anyone or any situation have all of that power again over my life. I’m realizing that I am enough, because I am figuring out the first part of the phrase…the “I AM”.

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