Hey, everyone. I hope you all are well. I am doing OK. Not better and not worse. I had a long and honest conversation with my sister last night, which really was enlightening to me. She asked me about me, about him, about the relationship, and about the break-up. She also offered me some constructive criticism as well. I received this conversation with anger and resistance at first, until she sensed it and asked me to talk about it. As the conversation continued, I felt more and more comfortable. I don’t like bringing my anxiety and stressors to the forefront, but I realize that that is something I have to do to heal. I woke up this morning feeling achy and under the weather. I napped, felt lonely, and went on with my tasks. I only ever nap when I’m feeling sick. I braved my emotions, went on Facebook, literally almost threw up, and made some decisions tonight…though, hard. I decided to delete my Facebook for good and to delete all of the pictures of us and pictures that reminded me of us from my Instagram. I cried, felt a lot of things…anxiety, depression, goosebumps, sweating, chills, nausea, racing thoughts. I also decided to not pursue MMA at this time. I need to save money, and is this even ME? I would like to take some boxing, cardio, and HIIT classes at the Y and see where I can go from there. I don’t want to give up the Y and yoga, 2 places where I feel comfortable, healthy, and productive. It kind of sucks to be me at this present moment, but I know this isn’t the end.
Published by LearningtolovemeMarie
Hello, my name is Marie. I am a 20-something who wants to heal her emotional wounds and help her clients to heal as well. I am a clinical social worker (almost fully-licensed LCSW!) who deeply cares about my clients. I try to use my own life lessons, trials, and tribulations to better help myself and others. I pride myself in presenting to my clients as "more-human-than-most" and often let them know that I am a work in progress as well. I attribute my vast collection of self-help books on my book shelf not only to my clients' "presenting problems" but also my own. I have attempted to create 2 blogs recently on a different site and found myself feeling frustrated and expressing negativity and anger (this was leading up to my breakup). Now that I am in a different place, I aim to keep this blog positive, but real, as I share with you my journey toward healing my body, mind, and spirit--and finding myself somewhere along the way. I will be sharing my favorite resources, quotes, and pictures that are helping me through this difficult time. My hope is that you will find some healing from this blog and from my experiences. View all posts by LearningtolovemeMarie