Long time no talk

Hello, my beautiful and loved WordPress followers! I started writing a blog post yesterday before I went to sleep, but it was a cranky and tangential post (clinical psychology term…I’m sorry). I am not sure what I sought to accomplish by writing it. My goal on here and on my Instagram (@learningtolovememarie) is to keep things positive but real…or at least end my posts on some type of positive note or affirmation. I think the unpublished post from yesterday accomplished neither, so I mindfully chose to not post it. I hope you all are doing well. I am doing a lot better today…not perfect, but not so much in despair. Who ever really feels *perfect* anyway? I’m taking a little break from my workday to write this. I am working my usual Tuesday 1-9PM shift. I had 2 clients today and have 3 more to go. I was supposed to have 7, so I am thankful for my cancellations and downtime–when I am able to self-care and get my work done (and blog!). I’m on a new health kick and so far so good! This weekend really brought to my attention my need to get back into fitness and health…my LA Fitness fitness assessment freaked me out . For quite some time lately, I’ve been talking about old habits I had become used to in my relationship and almost unknowingly was replacing them with some bad habits in my time of grieving, especially comfort eating. I looked myself in the mirror (and in my Instagram camera) on Sunday and realized I needed to make a change. And I’m a measly 2 days-in, but am going strong. I went to yoga this morning and have been eating a low carb, high protein diet. Tomorrow I will go to the gym to continue rebuilding the muscular strength that I lost since feeling depressed. Giving myself goals helps me to focus on myself and put my energy to good use. I have a lot more time to do so now. Though I know I will grieve the loss of my relationship for quite some more time, I need to develop new routines and habits for myself. It’s not easy and I miss him dearly, but life has given me this opportunity to do for and find myself before I begin dating again and before I settle down/ get married, and have kids one day (hopefully). I think I have to chalk this up to the universe at this point, keep the faith, and live life with intention. Okay! Back to work.

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